My alma mater, The University of Georgia, had a problem in 2011. Its mascot was going extinct. The English Bulldog, once an active and aggressive sporting dog, had spent the last century getting fatter and lazier as breeders’ efforts to meet kennel club standards exacerbated the dog’s health problems. Both kennel clubs and consumers alike valued the look of the dog’s short, smooshed snout, which is commonly the root of breathing problems and other related physical ailments. Making matters worse, UGA compounded a genetic problem by insisting on replacing each of its eight fallen mascots since 1956 with an all-white, full-blooded male heir to the doghouse. This hyper-selective breeding of the famous bulldog mascot resulted in the premature deaths of two dogs in two years.
To address the problem, the school departed from tradition. The current canine representative for the University has some brown markings and is the half-brother of his predecessor. Fortunately, most of the southern school’s supporters seem to have accepted this instance of chromatic integration with less resistance than in times past.
Not unlike UGA’s recent biological dilemma, the laws of political evolution are dictating a similar fate of extinction to America’s political conservatives, who are ironically lacking in their own collective pigmentation. The last two Presidential elections along with a Census Bureau forecast that predicts whites will be a minority by 2043 are evidence that modern conservatism’s days are numbered. However, do not be fooled by the new rhetoric of right-wing politicians who simply seek to add minorities to the fold. The demographic homogeneity of conservatives, and by extension, the Republican Party, is not the direct cause of their devolution. Instead, the imminent cause of death is a shallow gene pool of inbred ideas recycled by prominent peddlers of faulty logic, an extremist faction, and one bitter, lonely media outlet. Continue reading